I just had the funniest series of random-thoughts-upon-waking!
I had to get up to go use the privy (i.e. outhouse) It’s a tiny bit of a walk. Not far, but not right next to my trailer either. As I’m walking, I’m just blathering away in my mind (as I am wont to do, Blatherbabe and all!)(mind you, I am still mostly asleep, so the blathering is almost a dream)and the person I’m blathering away to (in my mind) is Six, the man I just had the crush on, the man who let me down so easy, so sweetly and with such kindness and humor. And what am I babbling away to him about, in my still mostly asleep mind? Why, sex, of course, and I’m describing to him how I am no longer vanilla, tie me up, pull my hair, bite me, throw me around, bend me this way and that. The conversation (in my half-dream) is not a charged conversation, it’s two friends talking, the type of conversation I have with my girlfriends, my gay friends, and, well, one or two of my straight guy friends… though, in this “walking dream” Six does pretend to get a wee bit turned on by this sexual confessional of mine. “Hey now!” I say “Remember, I’m a Gemini!” (his mom’s a Gemini, all Gemini women “essentially remind him” of his mom. There’s a bit of an ewww factor for him at the thought of dating a Gem.)(I don’t blame him, I once broke up with a guy when I realized he had my dad’s nose…well, he also had bad breath, and we had no sexual chemistry, but the nose was definitely a factor!)
I digress. (what else is new?)”Hey now!” I say “Remember, I’m a Gemini! Don’t get all excited! Not unless you plan on getting an Oedipal complex!” “That’s funny!” he replies “Did you just come up with that?” “No” I say, rapid-fire “I’ve been thinking about it for a couple of days…but isn’t it hilarious?”
I continue with the confessional “Oh, now, don’t get me wrong, I like soft, sweet, and slow too. A variety, mix it up!” Then I say “Don’t you EVER tell “B.” ( a friend of mine, an acquaintance of his) that I’m no longer Vanilla…I’ve been using that as an excuse for years! Now B, we CAN’T get together, we’re not sexually compatible. I’m vanilla, you’re not. It just wouldn’t work! If he ever knew I was no longer vanilla, I’d have to think of something else to tell him to keep him at bay!”
By this time I’m back at The Airstream, and I realize how not charged this conversation (in my mind) is. I’m staring out the window, and I think “Oh wow, I’m over it ! THAT was fast!” and as I think this I notice that the blank space between the boughs of the trees through my window forms a perfect seven, and I think “Hmmm, seven, I wonder what that means?” Then it hits me: “Six…Seven…NEXT!”
Oh my lord, that is hysterical! The goddess made a funny!